I might be the only one that thinks this way. Maybe it’s because I sit here and write my own story on a daily basis. Maybe it’s because another chapter is coming to an end and I know exactly who you are in my story. So, I sit here wondering, what role do I play in yours? Is my chapter already over? Am I in multiple chapters? Will I make it to the end?
I wonder if I am the friend; the one who tells you the things that you need to hear. The one that is a constant reminder of the beautiful person that you are. The one who hears all of your secrets and holds them tightly to her chest. The one that you can’t see your life without.
I wonder if I am more than that. Am I the one that you have feelings for but you can’t seem to get the words out. Or the one that you met a little too late, the one that made you think about all the ‘what ifs.’ The one that you talk to about the problems that you are having with other girls, looking for the words that you need to reassure yourself. The one who, no matter what, will always tell you the truth even when you don’t want to hear it.
I wonder if I am the villain; the one who unknowingly broke your heart and left you there hurting. The one who is vindictive and calculated, the one who won’t let you love anyone else. The one who you everyone wants you to get rid of.
I wonder if I am the one at the end; the one who was always right in front of you but it took you a lifetime to realize it. The one who was always in your heart but you just wouldn’t let it happen. The one who keeps showing up when you least expect it. The one who always stays, keeping you hoping and wishing.
Am I even in your story at all? Am I just some secondary character that you met once upon a time and forgot about. The one who was a passerby that made you take a second look but nothing more. The one who is just an extra person in your story. A filler to the bigger stuff.
It could be worse, I could be a part of someone else’s chapter. A piece of a love quote written to someone else.
But then I wonder if I am the one, your person. The one who made it all the way to the end. The one who stole your heart at the very beginning and completed your love story. The one that everyone was rooting for, the one they all wanted you to end up with because it was all so beautiful. The one that leaves you smiling and giving you hope for the future. I wonder if I bring out the best in you. I wonder if you will keep coming back, if you will never leave.
I mean, I think I know that within your story I have been a little bit of all of it. I was the villain who broke your heart and left you wondering where it all went wrong. But you knew where it went wrong, you were mean to me and just couldn’t love me the way I loved you. I have also been your friend, the one that you came running to when the lights went out. I was the friend even when I didn’t want to be, I kept that smile on my face and kept going. I had to keep telling myself that it was better to be your friend than nothing at all, you were in my life.
I also know that I have been a secondary character. The one that you pushed away and forgot about for a little while. You moved away, moved on, grew up. And that is okay because you have been in this place in my story too.
But then I think that maybe one day, I could be the one at the end of your story too. The one that you are going to look for when you realize that you let your big love slip away. The one that you look back on and think that you really did love me and I loved you. It’s a day where you are no longer uncertain and a day where you are sure of the person you have become. I think of the day that you will finally come back and say those three little words again. I’m the girl. I’m the one. I’m your person. I love you.
I think of the day when maybe our happy endings will meet. The day where the story will end and we are sitting together in awe. You have always been a part of my story.
Have I been a part in yours?