Moonshadow

Spoiler Warning…

If you have not watched ‘Moonshadow’

DO NOT PROCEED ANY FURTHER

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“But then I saw you and I stood the other girl up.”

“I wonder who she was.”

“I never have.”

Yesterday was the season finale of the most impactful, life-changing and groundbreaking show I have ever watched. Was I mad that I had built up every wall in order not to have an emotional breakdown with how I thought the direction of the season finale was going to go? Not even a little bit. Dan Fogelman, Issac Aptaker and Elizabeth Berger wrote such a beautiful finale that brought us back to the beginning with Rebecca and Jack.

The moment that it occurred to me that Jack was driving drunk, 2 hours, to see his wife I knew something awful was going to happen. I knew that through some cruel cosmic twist of events that this would be how Jack was going to get his ending. I was so upset, Jack deserves better than that – WE deserve better than that. However, this episode was not all doom and gloom. This episode also gave us hints at the direction that season 2 will take.

How long will they stay apart?

Will they get back together?

Was this what pushed Miguel closer to Rebecca?

Will they have some crazy, intense post-fight sex?

As it turns out it was fate that brought Jack and Rebecca together. It is fate that keeps their relationship strong. It is fate that their children grew up to be the adults that they are. Fate surrounds this family and I am thankful that we got to see how it all started.

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The fight brought everything into perspective about the way they have been feeling. The dormant feelings that they have sheltered from one another. Rebecca, wholeheartedly, wanted to become a singer her entire life (I am glad that we get this, Mandy Moore is such a powerhouse, I miss her voice) and even though she has thrived as a mother, as wife it still makes her question herself. Jack, on the other hand, always leads with his heart and he doesn’t always think things through (a man of my own heart). He is busting his ass off for his family, trying to be the breadwinner and their biggest supporter. You can see the pain on his face when Rebecca threatens everything they have built over the last 20 years, was the life they built not enough for her?

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The chemistry that Milo Ventimiglia and Mandy Moore have is some of the best on-screen I have seen. It is natural and apparent that, even outside of the show, the two care deeply for each other. It was not fun sitting there, in my living room, watching them hash it out. The tension was apparent and it hurt. To see them tear each other down, to watch them cry and yell was taxing, draining – I can’t imagine what it was like for them in the moment.

At the point where Rebecca tells Jack to leave; the point where everyone probably lost their cool, was the moment when it set in that all the damage had been done. It was a bittersweet ending but it was real. Things like that happen every single day. They didn’t fight for the relationship, Rebecca didn’t and neither did Jack. They need to take that breath and see if they can find their way back to each other. The fight that happened can be forgiven, but some of the words that were said will always be there.

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The final words of the episdoe, the ones that leave us hanging wishing Jack was ours, regardless of his flaws. He wasn’t trying to get Rebecca to turn a leaf and allow him to stay. He knew a line had been crossed. He knew the words that he had said during the argument were not his best choices to getting his marriage back on the right path. Jack probably didn’t think he was going to get kicked out of the house, but he is smart and he knew that staying wouldn’t make anything better. The space that they will get, the space that we will get until the air-date for season 2, will be us all catching our breath. They know that they are broken, but what is broken can be fixed – or at least we, and Jack hopes so.

“I love the mother that you are. I love that you are still the most beautiful womanΒ in any room and that you laugh with your entire face. I love that you dance funny… and not sexy, which makes it even sexier. But most of all, I love that you are still the same woman who, all those years ago, who ran out of a blind date because she simply had to sing. You’re not just my great love story, Rebecca. You… you were my big break. And our love story, I know it may not feel like it right now, but, baby… I promise, it’s just getting started.” – Jack

So, if you are looking for comfort, listen to those words on repeat. Listen carefully.

The show forces people to hold up a mirror to our own lives and look at the choices we’ve made. I love that it pushes all of our buttons to on, especially nostalgia. This episode gave me two things: one, it will give me time to think about how time tests everything and how sometimes things dimish as time moves on; two, we got to see their struggle and now we will get to see moments that are going to be tough, we will get to see something more raw.

Take comfort, she still wears her necklace – his necklace.

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